A few weeks ago I was invited along to London’s South Bank to witness a performance that could quite easily have been an entry to the Turner Prize. There, on a sunny afternoon (OK, it was sunny-ish) Sanex had set up a box with some perspex podiums in which stood 3 girls and 1 guy. These four performers were trained in the Graham Technique, moving almost in slow motion for the 20 minute performance. It was certainly an improvement on the usual touristy living sculptures that litter the streets.

Two of the girls and the guy were covered in coloured paint while the remaining girl was covered in soap suds (actually it was shaving foam but Shhh don’t tell anyone I told you!) The paint was meant to represent the chemicals that just about every bath and shower product contains and which we blindly cover ourselves in every time we bathe or shower.

The girl in the whiter than white soap suds is of course representing new Sanex Zero% which contains no colourants, no parabens, no phthalates and no phenoxyethanol. I know, you’re probably thinking what the hell are they but a quick look at the back of most bath and shower gels will reveal them, in teeny small print. They may not be deadly but you wonder why it is only now that someone has come up with a product that doesn’t contain them. They don’t do anything for your skin and it’s no wonder that more and more people are suffering from skin complaints, whether excessive dryness or worse.

New Sanex Zero% comes in both shower gels for normal, dry and sensitive skin and as a foam bath for normal skin. Both products are biodegradable and have been proven to have minimal impact on aquatic ecosystems, so much so that it has been awarded the European Ecolabel which although I had never heard of, was established in 1992 to encourage businesses to market products and services that are kinder to the environment. So, say goodbye to unnecessary chemicals and hello to healthy skin thanks to Sanex Zero%

Now, I’m sure you are wondering more about the performance , well, wonder no more as it was filmed and I’ve included it here for you. What I did find mildly amusing was the male performer, who was from Glasgow, complaining that it was cold while the girls, who were visibly shivering, said nothing.

Tickets were limited to 2,000 and as you can imagine demand was intense meaning anyone trying to register now will be disappointed to find that all tickets have gone but don’t be too sad because I have 5 pairs of exclusive tickets to this Monday’s event, 4 July 2011, at 8.15pm in Shoreditch to give away!

To be in with a chance of winning a pair of tickets to this event, just answer this question:

Where in London will the Black Diamond take place?  A) Hackney B) Shoreditch C) Bethnal Green

Email your answer, with your name and a contact telephone number, to: COMPETITION CLOSED

Winners will be selected at random and notified by email by 2pm on Monday 4 July.

Don’t forget you can follow the story online at www.stellaartoisblack.com without having to attend any of the events.

Stella Artois Black is matured for longer giving it a richer, fuller flavour with an abv. of 4.9%. Mr Omneo asks that you please remember to always drink responsibly.

Yesterday I received a memo from Police Inspector  CJ Tibor requesting my attendance at a press conference which was held this evening. It seems someone, they suspect it was Etienne Chabrol, stole The Black Diamond from Jacques Ferre just as he was about to give it to his true love, Cecile Fontaine. Needless to say, Jacques wasn’t very happy as he’d just spent 7 years hand carving it for Cecile, so he did what anyone else would do…he placed a curse on the diamond.

Whoever has that diamond will be shaken from their dreams by the hand of misery. They will be alone, they will be betrayed, they will be heartbroken until time, the only true god, restores it to me.

If you think that sounds like the opening scene of a movie you’d only be partly correct; what it is in fact is the start of something quite special that will immerse a few thousand lucky Londoners in a tale of intrigue over the Summer.  What Inspector Tibor explained to those gathered at the press conference this evening was the story of The Black Diamond, or at least what the police know of it so far!

The Black Diamond is an immersive theatre experience so what it means in reality is you, if you’re lucky enough to get a ticket are thrust into a film noir movie which is set in 1960′s Paris and features 2 lovers, 1 diamond, a thief and that curse!  That’s right, not only are you a spectator you’ll also be an actor. Only you will discover the secrets of The Black Diamond over 8 evenings at events spread across various locations in East London but fear not, the  story will develop simultaneously online, giving a new depth to the production and offering an additional interactive perspective for the audience, whether you manage to get tickets to attend or not.

Now, if tonight’s press conference was anything to go by participants are in for a treat as Stella Artois Black, who commissioned The Black Diamond, have entrusted theatre producer Felix Barrett and the hugely talented Punch Drunk Theatre group to create this dramatic mix of on-line experiences and real life cinema complete with alluring characters and one-to-one interactions which puts the audience smack dab in the middle of a story of love, desire and deception. It certainly beats a night in watching Eastenders, I’m sure you’ll agree!

As events go this is certainly up there as one of the more unique and engaging I’ve been fortunate enough to attend. The conference was held at the Old Sessions House in Clerkenwell which was transformed into early 60′s Paris with actors not only in period attire but also mingling with the Press leaving you to wonder who was real and who was acting. The dossier handed out to we journalists was of exceptionally high quality; from the press pass to copies of criminal record reports, complete with glossy black and white photos and coffee stains right down to an edition of the broadsheet newspaper L’Histoire which contained English articles in amongst the French, each piece of paper and article adding a little more flesh to the bones of the story.

There are 2,000 free tickets available for over 18′s to take part in The Black Diamond which will run from 3rd to 21st July. So if you like a tale of mystery and intrigue you’ll want to secure yours, which is easy, just head to www.stellaartoisblack.com and get your name down now, you won’t regret it!

In case you’re dithering, watch the trailer, I’m sure it’ll convince you to take part.

Now, in case you’re wondering, Stella Artois Black is a blonde premium pils lager crafted exclusively in Leuven, Belgium and imported to the UK. It’s matured for longer giving it a rounded, full-bodied flavour and a refreshing aftertaste at 4.9% abv. If you, like me, are someone who doesn’t really like regular Stella Artois you’ll be pleasantly surprised, it has a very smooth finish and tastes continental. You’ll understand what I mean when you try it.

It would seem that more people were/are interested in who might have been having sex with someone they perhaps shouldn’t have been than were interested in getting out to vote last week on the referendum as to whether we should abandon the First Past The Post (FPTP) system for elections in favour of the Alternative Vote (AV) system. A whopping 41% of the eligible UK population voted of which around 70% favoured staying with what we have. What I find so sad about this is the way it’s advertised as a landslide victory for the No campaign. Yes, 70% does sound like a lot doesn’t it, but 70% of 40% is really on 28% of everyone…not so much a landslide as a sachet of Body Shop’s finest mud pack.

Last weekend I went for afternoon tea at the Edwardian Radisson at Leicester Square. In all honesty I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. Why? I hear you ask, well for one thing the scones, although nicely warm and served with a goodly helping of clotted cream failed to come with jam! Whoever heard of afternoon tea with jam-less scones and clotted cream?! My other niggle was once we had drunk the first pot of tea, 2 cups each, it was then like a session of Where’s Waldo in trying to find a member of staff to ask for another pot. Granted the sandwiches, scones and cakes were nice…the service was more than a bit lacklustre, this extended to trying to pay the bill, we finally got the bill but after 15 minutes had to go looking for someone to take the money. I would like to think our experience was a one-off but all the same, it was pretty poor form.

The afternoon wasn’t a complete waste, a trip to China Town saw me replenish my stocks of jasmine pearls (green tea, dried over Jasmine leaves and then rolled into small pearl-like balls which unfurl in water) and Oolong tea and then we stopped off at a Bubble Tea shop where I had a very tasty green apple milk tea.

Tonight I was fortunate enough to get tickets for the press night of Bette and Joan which is set during the making of their 1961 movie Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? and revisits their infamous fifty-year feud. It stars Anita Dobson and Greta Scacchi. It was very good, quite funny and not something I might have ordinarily chosen to go see but I was glad I did. There were quite a few luvvies in the audience including Patricia Hodge, Christopher Biggins, Cilla Black, Paul O’Grady and Clive Anderson who I kept referring to as  Clive James. I don’t think Clive James was there.

However as one of the shirts is white I’m not sure if I can call that a colour. I vaguely recall an artist attempting to explain to me  why it wasn’t really a colour but I switched off after about 20 minutes which I think took him another 20 to notice.

Anyway, I was actually a little impressed when I heard about the fashion imprint launch as the cynical me assumed that the more typical next step after Example Media and Example Magazine would be Example Music,. Just what the world needs, I could picture myself telling myself, another fucking record label being run out of someones mum’s attic. So fair play to them for steering clear of that!

What I also liked was the aim, to promote up and coming and underground designers.  I really do think in this era of mass produced clothing those starting out are finding it harder than ever to get a toe hold in the industry. What’s even better is that whilst the imprint is based in Manchester they’re happy to work with any UK based designers. Here’s to the end of those bland high street t-shirt designs, if you can call them that!

James Mernagh managed to find time in-between being founder of Example Media and his role as editor of Example Magazine to come up with Example Clothing’s first design which he titled, Making An Example. I asked him for the names of some of the other designers whose work we’ll start seeing soon but he wasn’t giving too much away although I do believe that one of the first things we’ll see will be by Omid Kashan but you never heard that here, not that anyone is likely to ask you but you never know!

Out of personal curiosity I asked James why he decided upon a fashion imprint and thought it amusing that he decided against it because he aknowledges that there are plenty of labels already out there with more joining them every day. Instead he said that

By starting a clothing imprint we felt we could spread our brand and also continue our ethos of supporting underground and young talent. Something which we are really excited about.  

So, keep an eye on Example Magazine which will shortly begin featuring young designers and artists who will then be commissioned to design one or more T-Shirt designs for the Example Clothing range.

Interesting factoid for you, also in the Example Clothing shop are some T shirts by Chimpo, that’s the Chimpo who did a remix of Skittle’s new track Tip-i-cal-ly…those Mancunians, they sure do get about!