Rip Van Winkle….

Well, it feels like an age since I blogged. Wait! It HAS been an age since I blogged, why does this not surprise me? Actually, I’m sure it doesn’t surprise you either, especially if you are one of the regular visitors who have told me either in person, on the phone or via email that I haven’t blogged since July. Funny, I never noticed I hadn’t been blogging ;)

So, what’s been keeping me so pre-occupied that I have forsaken this medium for disseminating my dislike of both Lilly Allen and Rupert ‘Australian Bastard American’ Murdoch? Well, I’m not really sure I know the answer myself. I recently stopped smoking marijuana, which I have to say I didn’t find at all difficult, but I do miss that feeling of getting high… well, the initial feeling. I don’t miss the way I used to find 6 hours had passed and all I had achieved was to eat the contents of the fridge whilst watching a couple of hours of badly acted porn. Now I have a full fridge but I’m still searching for some better acted porn ;)

I have been going out a little bit more than I did before, no doubt a direct result of not staying home stoned, now I sit around thinking, “What the fuck am I gonna do with myself?!” Like a lot of people I have become a convert of FaceBook and that in itself has helped as there are quite a few sociable people on there who are quite happy to meet in real life… Yes that’s right, SHOCK! HORROR! people who’ve met online meeting in real life for reasons other than casual sex (OK, some of that goes on as well but would you have believed me if I’d denied it anyway?) I’ve been meeting ‘online’ people ‘offline’ for a vast number of years and I don’t quite see what it is that people have such a hangup about. I’ve probably met more weirdos in bars and clubs than I have from the internet but everyone’s different and as long as you’re happy in your comfort zone who’s to say who’s right and who’s wrong… there IS no right or wrong, just differing perceptions; feel free to disagree :)

So, let’s get to the meat of this post, you know, the bit where I give an insight to my life past, present and quite possibly future. Let’s face it, everyone thinks everyone else’s life is somehow more interesting than their own, why else would millions of people around the world watch Big Bruvver and read Hello?!

I was a lousy dater. I’m trying to be better. When I say lousy I mean I wasn’t very good at it. Most people I know who are dating, in a non monogamous way, seem to quite happily manage to go out with 2, 3 or sometimes more people in a week/month and only when they’ve weighed up the pros and cons of each person then decide who it is they want to ‘go steady’ with. I was always crap at it. For some reason i could never feel comfortable going out on a ‘date’ with more than one person at a time, to see other people was akin to cheating in my mind. even when i knew the person I was going out with was seeing other people I still didn’t feel comfortable doing likewise. Don’t ask me why, I have no fricking idea why I am that way, I just know I am.. or was.. I’m trying to change and it would appear that at 36 (yes, I’ve had another birthday) I’ve now decided that resistance in futile… I cannot buck the trend, I have to assimilate…

I met up with a few people I know from FaceBook in De Hems, the best Dutch pub outside the Netherlands, for their ‘Dutch Party Night’ things started late as there was soccer on TV, so no party could start till that was over and if you had heard the state of the DJ you’d have started to wish the match had gone to extra time! However, as I sat there, supping my drink I noticed a girl in the group who was, quite literally, breathtakingly beautiful. Whilst I couldn’t take my eyes off her I was also aware that she was probably thinking I was some sort of stalker as every time she looked over I hurriedly looked at the floor… Needless to say, after a few more drinks I forgot that I was shy and we started to converse. With hindsight I accept I perhaps had a few drinks too many as I forgot most of what we talked about, however I do remember stepping on her toes at some point and then, for reasons best known to myself, I proceeded to get down on my knees, removed her shoe and kissed her foot by means of an apology, despite her telling me it was all sweaty, nothing a quick wipe didn’t solve ;) I’m now trying to persuade her to come out for a drink with me, she’s sort of agreed but seems to want to wait another month, possibly she’s hoping I forget and give up… Doesn’t she know? resistance is futile! ;)

Then, just the other day an impromptu drink was organised, or rather suggested by someone I have long thought utterly gorgeous but never considered as anything but a fantasy as it would have meant, as a colleague might say, me punching above my weight. However, being a firm believer in you gotta give everything a go so you’re not left wondering, “What if?” I agreed and in the end only she and I were the two out. OH. MY. GOODNESS. She was not only mesmerisingly beautiful but she was intelligent, witty, amusing and talked more than me! If I’m honest I doubt I really stand much of a chance as she did tell me she dated a lot and I would imagine that most of the men she dates are far more solvent than me and whilst money isn’t everything, it sure helps in London. On the plus side, she does like pubs over bars and she likes pub quizzes! Oh and she did say we should meet again, so I guess maybe I was wrong to assume she wouldn’t want to see me again… we’ll see what happens.

Dating… it’s all so alien a concept to me, how did I manage to get to 36 without having to do it? Why didn’t I date when I was younger? then things would be easier, wouldn’t they? OK, perhaps dating is never easy, that’s why they sell mumbo jumbo books of common sense for $99 or your money back within 30 days if you don’t get laid… but lets face it, anyone can get laid, it’s that something extra we’re all after.

Anyway, my tub of Belgian chocolate Haagen-Dazs is finished and that was the sole motivator for this blog entry, so now that it’s gone, the words have dried up (OK, that’s a lie but I want to watch a film I downloaded before it’s too late so I have to finish now!)

Musically I thought I’d finish with something a little different. Drum n Bass may not be everyone’s cup of tea but this track by High Contrast blends something old with something new and i think you may be pleasantly surprised, so go on, reserve judgement for 5minutes and 41 seconds while you listen to Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

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