Feelings, nothing more than feelings…

So, I just watched a movie called Numb starring Matthew Perry, Chandler of Friends fame. It was one of those rare films that actually made me feel quite happy, in a depressingly uplifting sort of a way. The last time I watched a movie that really spoke to me was when I watched Lost In Translation however I admit that back then I may have been swayed by the gorgeous Scarlett Johansson, however even without her it was still a great movie. Numb was very good, it actually felt like someone had reached in and witnessed a little of how I feel and then penned it into a scenario in a movie, which was handy considering it was a movie!

Now that it’s finished there are just two things running around in my head. The first is the realisation that I may never meet my Sara, or that I already have done and have blown it… that in itself is a depressing thought, to think that I may have to live out this life solo. In fact it is so depressing a thought I’m contemplating going out and buying an ounce of strong marijuana so that I may get so stoned that I will not be aware that my Sara is not about to enter my life any time soon… The second is the words to a Regina Spektor song that started to play in my head three quarters of the way through the film, the song in question is Better and again, it has some beautiful lyrics which are super enhanced by being matched with some pretty amazing music… I realised that even at my wildest ambition I could possibly write some decent shit but I could never pen music to match… perhaps that’s a truth for some people, the ability to write words is enough for some and the ability to write music is enough for others. Somehow of course I feel half a man for knowing that I can only ever achieve one of the the two and in accepting that fact I resign myself to being able to achieve neither of them.

Here are the lyrics of Better… don’t they read just fine?

Better by Regina Spektor
If I kiss you where it’s sore
If I kiss you where it’s sore
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all

Born like sisters to this world
In a town where blood ties are only blood
If you never say your name out loud to anyone
They can never ever call you by it

If I kiss you where it’s sore
If I kiss you where it’s sore
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all

You’re getting sadder, getting sadder, getting sadder, getting sadder
And I don’t understand, and I don’t understand
But if I kiss you where it’s sore
If I kiss you where it’s sore
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all
Will you feel better, better, better
Will you feel anything at all
Anything at all
Will you feel anything at all
Anything at all
Will you feel anything at all
Anything at all…

I dunno, just reading them makes me feel both sad and happy. It bothers me that I should feel this way, it bothers me that I don’t always feel happy and it bothers me that I feel bothered by not feeling happy. Yet at the same time, I feel happy that I can find lyrics such as these so uplifting, it would be hellish nice to find a girl to replace the words sometimes.

Wanna know how the song goes? Have a listen…enjoy!

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