Make Like Wesley…

If there is one thing I enjoy, it’s having a gamble.  There is something quite exhilarating in putting a few pounds on a horse, a dog, a football team, your favourite number or just choosing between odd and even or red and black.

Many moons ago I was quite a regular gambler.  I was a follower of the horses and more often than not came out ahead, I have to admit it was more out of luck than any real understanding of form.  A friend still, to this day, spends hours going through the Racing Post and track conditions of the days meetings and scribbles away in a book, compiling his great system.  When I pop over to visit he’ll be checking on teletext to see how his predictions got on and often I’d ask to have a look at the days Racing Post.  After 5 or 10 minutes I’d give him my prediction and quite often I’d pick either the winner or the one that came second, occasionally third but certainly 8 out of 10 times it would be 1st, 2nd or 3rd.  To this day he still asks how I do it, more so when his hours of calculations leave him backing the one that came 7th out of 12 runners.

I gave up backing horses when I realised I couldn’t trust myself.  I had a telephone betting account with a major bookmaker with a £1,000 credit limit.  The £10 bets turned into £50 bets and then £100 bets and suddenly I was betting on football, something I know very little about, both then and now.  The week I lost £500 in 5 bets was the week I cancelled my account, paid the bill and vowed not to return to betting for a long time.

A respectable time passed and, with the horses out of the way, I started going to the casino.  That was more manageable, I would put aside a little money each week and then once a month I’d hit the roulette table.  I’d have say £100 to spend and this was what I was prepared to lose and I’d play until I’d either lost it all or came away with the same as I started or, if I was lucky, more!

Poker is a game I’ve never learnt to play and it’s probably in my own interests never to learn, roulette is enough of a game of chance to entertain me and fool me into thinking I have as much chance as anyone of winning.  There’s no real skill to it, you simply pick a number, a colour, odd or even and hope for the best.  As the balls spins around you pray to whatever higher power you pray to, I find vodka works well and if you win Hooray!  If you lose, fuckit, better luck next time. :D

With the advent of the Internet you now don’t even have to get dressed up to go to the casino, you can simply sit there in front of the PC in your boxer shorts or bra and knickers and fritter away the housekeeping.  Sure you miss the glamour of it all but the advantage is you can bet at your own pace, pause long enough to go for a pee or to make a cup of tea and not have to worry that you’ve missed anything and if you win, there’s no jealous eyes staring at you and of course if you lose you have no one to hide from but yourself.

I actually have a roulette system which is perfect for on-line casinos, I used it last year and turned £100 into £600 in the space of a week.  I was greedy however and started to deviate from the system and guess what? I lost it all :p  It wasn’t so bad as the £100 was actually money the casino had matched.  It’s a common ploy of on-line casinos to get you playing with them. You deposit a sum and they match it, suddenly your £100 has turned into £200.  The smart gambler straight away withdraws their stake leaving just the casinos money to play with.  Then if you lose, you lose nothing of your own.  You’d be surprised how many people lose their own stake money as well as the casinos!

Anyway, I might dig out my roulette system for you later this week but in the meantime why not have some fun playing online for free with Ladbrokes Casino.  You can play away in test mode using dummy money so you can experience the thrills n spills and not lose a penny but likewise that £40,000 you just won…  Sorry, it’s just pretend money I’m afraid :(

REMEMBER: Mr Omneo advises you to gamble responsibly, never bet more than you can afford to lose and if you lose big, please don’t come looking for me cos it’s not my fault.  If however you win a million I’m more than happy to accept a drink, dinner or an Alfa Romeo convertible from you ;)

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