Some days more than others I stop and momentarily find myself unable to remember how old I am. I have to quickly subtract my year of birth to remind myself, usually with a surprise in my voice, “Fuck I’m (oldenoughtoknowbetter, youngenoughnottocare)!”
It happened a few weeks ago when I was buying some shirts and a jacket. As I tried them on in the changing rooms I looked at myself in the mirror and thought, “Jeez, I can remember wearing almost identical clothes 20 years ago” then I wondered if I was subconsciously trying to recapture my youth. This is a particular peril which comes from working in an environment where everything you do, from the way you yawn to the smell of your fart, has some hidden meaning and if you can decipher the hidden meaning then the secret of life is yours my friend! Just send £19.95 for postage and packing to me here at Omneo Towers, London (cash only please!)
Another sign that I think I’m getting old is the delight I found myself getting when I opened a box knowing that what it contained was a towel bale, duvet covers, sheets and 2 cushions. I mean it hardly ranks up there with say a new laptop or a fancy camera or an iPhone. All items that you should be excited about because of all the cool shit that your shiny new toy will provide.
No, this was towels, bed linen and some cushions. I had to stop and really think, “Why am I enjoying the fact I have this new stuff?” I mean who gets excited by sheets?? Obviously I do… by the way in case there are any cotton geeks out there who are into all this stuff, the sheets and duvet covers are 400 count Egyptian cotton, assuming of course you believe the label. I for one am not going to count to make sure.
I also had further delayed retail therapy when the new glasses I ordered from Glasses Direct arrived late in the afternoon. The pair I got from D&A last year took about 5 days to have ready and the pair I received today were ordered on 30 July that’s the same time if you take out the weekend. Very comfortable and only £34
All this putting up pictures and buying new bed linen and cushions and scouring the on-line for a sofa that I really like, that I can afford that will actually fit into my flat reminds me that it’s almost 6 years since I moved in and I’m only now thinking I should decorate it to make it my own as opposed to the unfurnished flat that I rent. That too makes me feel old, to be buying furniture alone, it was never how I pictured it.